Graves Into Gardens

When food tastes like Vinegar

And sleep is another helpless tool

To run away from a painful reality

To escape a time so dark and cruel

When distraction seems to be

my only way to get through the night

Whrestling with many questions

Yet no one is aware of the constant battle fight

In the pit of despair

I wait for the pain to stop.

For the distress to end

Wait for a message to come

For a call of a friend

Maybe a pill of medicine will help

Or perhaps a therapist might understand

The heavy burden I've carried long

The enormous pain I can no longer withstand

Its eating me up slowly

Like cancer spreading out fast

When will this pain go away

How long is it ever gonna last?

Stuck in a season

My wounds can't seem to heal

Sick and tired of

"we've all been there,

We know how you feel"

Like Job the afflicted

I plead heaven for an answer

Can sex, money and alcohol give rest

Or a "10 steps of a life enhancer"?

While they all have the same impression

Yet nothing can satisfy to the core

Only grants pleasure for a moment

While leaves me empty and thirsty for so much more

Indeed my agony is great

much greater than any other

Im in need of a savior

A savior well familiar with suffer.

I've heard about him since my infancy

And Im well familiar with the stories

The faithful God of Abraham and Jacob

The mighty works of the Salvatore

Yet I never felt him to be close

Could never sense his presence around

Despirately searching for the proof

Even for a whisper or a sound

But no, there's no point of trying

So why trouble me with the same story?

I've heard enough already

About a king full of power and glory

If he was that mighty

And very loving towards me

How can he be so careless about my pain

If he truely understands

And Im precious as you say

how can he hide himself and not explain?

Weighted down by my burden

I run to the saints,

Those who call themselves his.

They preach for long

Of things I already knew

Displaying their knowledge

With of a bible verse or two

Skillful in speach

Their words aim to cut deep

They ask for a prayer at the end

And make promises they do not keep

While ignorant of my longstanding pain

They show empathy only for a minute

Each looking after his own business

Minding least about a lost soul or how to win it.

So who can break the walls of my prison cell

Who can save this lost generation of youth

While religion presents unfitting solutions

Freedom lies in a relationship with the truth!

The absolute truth

Not mine nor theirs,

A relationship with an unchangeable God

Who's not far from hopeless prayers

Out of love he created a man by his own image

Him he placed and gave a part

Yet the heart of the problem

was the problem of a human heart

Rebellious and corrupt it turned against its creator

Demanding independance from the source of life

A sin which made its way in

Leaving seperation, corruption, envy and strife

The land was cursed

With sickness, pain and suffer

Mistrust and hate

Between a man and his own brother

But why would a good God allow it all to be?

Or how could his holy eyes tolerate to see?!

Well a man was created with an intellect and a free will

Not a machine to be programmed and assigned

for God's purpose to fulfill

No, not God..

He has respect for a man's decision

I have set before you a way of life another of death,

chose life that ye may live

But in stubbornness of heart a man refused to listen

And since the wages of sin is death

Justice had to be satisfied with a price

Either by releasing the death sentence

Or to offer in his place a perfect sacrifice

Nailed to a cross made for sinners

That day Son of God gave his life for mine

No greater love has anyone but that of his

The holes in his hands and feet are the sign

The gift of eternal life freely is offered

to them who have believed

Not by excellent work or good deeds

But by faith alone it may be received

An easy life here he promised us not

"In the world ye shall have trouble"

But I have overcome the world! He said

And so are we more than conquerors

in his name by the power of the blood which was shed

So though the storms of this life hit even stronger

My heart rests in peace which is not of this world

My soul rejoices in times of adversity

And dances on the raging waves that are hurled

For the Lord has become my strength

He set my feet on a higher ground

When shall I dwell in his house

To delight in his magnificent beauty all around

There he himself shall wipe away every tear from my eyes

There shall be no more death, mourning or crying

A place with no oppression or guile

With no pain, sorrow or sighing

No longer will it come to rememberance

The valley of Baca I went through

For all the former things have passed away

And everything has been made as new!

A new creation in him I live as of now

On this journey of healing and restoration

My savior holding me by the hand

By his grace, victorious shall I reach my final destination!

Let this be my testimony

By mercy I have received God's pardon

Glory forever be to Him

Who gives beauty for ashes

Who turns graves into gardens!